conflict

Every now and then, we would encounter situations that can be classified as conflicts. conflicts are bound to happen in any human relations because, as the name suggested, we are only human. These unpleasant situations are triggered by the disagreement or differences between two parties. 

   "Sometimes these differences look trivial, but when a conflict triggers strong feelings, a deep personal need is at the core of the problem, such as a need to feel safe and secure, a need to feel respected and valued, or a need for greater closeness and intimacy. (http://www.helpguide.org/mental/eq8_conflict_resolution.htm)

Here are some ways to overcome conflicts.

1. Communication.

    Whenever a conflict arises, the first thing to establish is the communication. Talking. Try to find the root of the problem. Once the problem is identified, actions to solve the problem could be taken. on thing to remember in this stage is keeping your temper (talking from experience here). Try being as rational and emotionally uninfluenced. When emotions are involved, things might get difficult. keeping a level head is the key to a successful communication.

2. Toleration (give and take)

    In creating a good communication and relation, the parties involved must be considerate with one another. The parties need to be tolerant and try to understand the opposite parties. When we try to understand them, we would be able to figure out what is the source of the disagreement. Try and create a situation where both parties win. Either that, or try to work something out and reach an agreement.

3. Acceptance

   One way or another, we have to try and accept what the other party is going through. If the fault is ours, we must accept our wrongdoings and apologize. Clear things out with the other party. If it is their flaw, just accept them as it is.

4. Focus on the problem.

   The tendency to go off topic is very high. As a result, the conflict would lead to another, much bigger, conflict. Stay on the topic. Rather than trying to win the argument, focus on resolving the matter at hand.

5. Leave the past in the past.

   It is a bad habit to evoke a past. Let it be. Bringing up things never help to resolve the conflict and more often than not, it worsen the current conflict or even trigger another conflict. Just stay on the current issue. In order to create a peaceful resolutions, we must learn how to let things go.

6. Self control.

    Self control is very important in any argument or conflict. We must learn how and when to back down in each situation. If we pushed things too far, things would get tense and the situation would become very hard to resolve, fast. Whenever thins get too heated, take a step back and calm yourself before things go go out of control.

7. Avoidance

    Avoiding a conflict is usually a the way everyone choose. It is easy, and no complications. But BEWARE. Running away doesn't solve anything. 

Conflict can be distressing. True. But, if you think positive and see it as an opportunity, it can help you in various ways such as the process of growing up and being more mature.