A Sudden Crap?

Well...fuck.
Not a single notification and then there's a sudden UAK (Ujian Akhir Kursus)?
this ain't going to reflect well on my finals.
i wasn't even the slightest bit prepared for the freakin' thing, and no amount of open book can help the fact that i'm not prepared and i don't have the slightest bit of information in this empty head of mine.
to make things worse, my migraine has the habit of visiting whenever i'm stressed.
the pain was quite unbearable and i can't even concentrate to a single word i was writing.
people pushing me and pressuring me does't help either.
do this...do that... i need room to think.
if you can't ease that, than don't expect me to follow every single thing you ordered me.

Deprived

Sleep deprevation is a very serious problem. I'm talking through experince here. For the past few weeks, I've been slaving myself, pushing my body to the limit by staying up to complete my work..
It's hard when you are lazy, dumb and forgetful.
To make things worse, my small attention span isn't improving at all.

Back to the main concern.
My sleeping timetable had gone out the window a few weeks ago. With the messed up sleeping timetable, my body is quite worn down.
I'm not in my best condition... and I'm barely hanging on as it is...
The recent changes also put some stress on my mental and also emotional stability.

I am tired. I need an out very soon.

How things are now.

I feel like I'm being used... I just do. Come on. I want to talk bout meager things too. I want.....

But that's just it.
I can't WANT anymore.
So just nut up and shut up.
Get use to it.

I feel nothing.

My nothingness

My mission: feel nothing.

I need to feel nothing. I need to be strong again.

Life lessons

I'm gonna tell you some useful life lessons so you don't screw up in the future.

1. Don't wake a man from his slumbers. (Unless its life or death)

Mysteries of the world

My whole life, I've been surrounded by women. My mom. My big sis. My little sis. My gf/fiancè/wife. (You know who you are)
But even now I still can't understand them. Sure, some part of the month u got to be really careful around them. And they really like to be praised. A lot. They need attention. They are always right even when their wrong. They search for perfection. And so on and so forth.
The list goes on and on and on. Yup. They're complex beings.
And all these complex little details, you would think that they are rock hard..

But nooo...
They're fragile as hell...
I learnt that the hard way.
If I ever get a daughter(hopefully no), I would give her tough love even from a young age.
I'm not gonna let her be fagile.
I need her to be rock hard. But not to the point of heartless (like me)

Man...I really have a lot to learn....